Today I got the privilege to sit down with Jen Ready again and talk about the biggest turning points in our recovery.
Both Jen and I had PTSD and have fully recovered from it.
Along our journey we both ran into a series of turning points that made all the difference. Each one was an epiphany that launched us forward and inspired us to keep working.
Today we want to share our biggest turning points to show you that you're not alone, and that full recovery is possible for everyone willing to keep going when times get tough.
We both believe in you with our entire being! If you have any questions on anything please reach out!
To your recovery!
Kayleen
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Kayleen Wright: Very coo! So I guess before we jump in, I'll do an intro. But I want to congratulate you personally on passing your class.
Jen Ready: Well, thank you. I know I was really excited when that happened. I was like, Yes!
Kayleen Wright: That's such a huge win. Just like in general, that's such a huge win. And it's such a huge weight off, and is a long time coming. So that is awesome. And can you hear me okay, too? Yeah. Okay, perfect. Perfect. Yeah, so I guess I'll just do kind of a quick intro. So, for those of you who are listening, you know, my name is Kayleen. I'm a PTSD recovery coach. Jen Ready and I are here today to talk a little bit about turning points in recovery. You know, you kind of... Jen, you reached out. I don't know if you want to do a quick intro on yourself, and kind of what you're doing and what you've been up to recently. You're welcome to do that. And then we can jump into our topic of turning points in recovery.
Jen Ready: Sure. My name is Jennifer Reddy. I am a client of Kayleen. I started working with her in January, and I have made leaps and bounds in my recovery. And I just reached out to her because I really like, you know, talking about my wins and how, how far I've come and, you know, give people some hope to let them know, Hey, you can do this too. Right now, I'm in Business School. I'm a busy mom, a military wife. And I'm working on a professional speaking career right now and volunteering. So all kinds of stuff. And thanks for having me here. Kayleen!
Kayleen Wright: Yeah, thank you for being here. And you are kind of the genesis of this as kind of always, you're the one who wanted to set this up and wanted to, you know, reach out and create some content together, which I love. I think it's awesome. And your drive to help people is amazing. It's out of this world. It's so far above and beyond. And I love that you say that you just said you made leaps and bounds because you really, really have. And just everything has changed so much in the past, probably six, eight months lasted It was a couple months ago. So eight months. And I love that, you know, you want to spread that hope because you know, we both know, and we'll talk about you know, when I when we talk about our turning points, definitely for me one turning point was that belief and spreading that hope and having someone to just be like, Hey, man, like, this is possible is so important. And so to spread out, hope together so special, and I so appreciate you saying that. And that's kind of your goal and mission here. So that's awesome.
Jen Ready: Absolutely.
Kayleen Wright: So we can kind of, you know, jump in, if you want. So then I decided to decided on the topic of turning points in recovery. So like Jen said, she's gonna be a speaker, and you're gonna be doing a is it this week?
Jen Ready: Yes, this coming week, I'm doing a talk. Actually, it's, I'll be doing a talk in front of the Zumba class I actually worked out with, I figured that'd be a good way to get my feet wet. And, you know, get it all started.
Kayleen Wright: Heck, yeah, that's gonna be that's gonna be awesome. And my advice always now when I was younger, and still am, but always was to record everything you do, and not necessarily to post it as content. But so you can look back and you can watch yourself as it because when you're presenting when you're playing whenever you're so in it, that like, it's hard to give yourself real feedback. Totally, that's not a great way to get your feet wet. And especially I know, you know, you you work locally with your church. And they're also a great group. I remember playing the guitar a few times when I was younger in front of church and like, the the priest or the pastor or whatever said to me, just like, this is the best crowd. They're the most forgiving crowd. So don't worry about it. And it was it was just kind of a funny piece of advice. But the the zoom, of course, will be awesome. And that's super cool. I've always wanted to do zoom, actually.
Jen Ready: It's really fun. It's really fun. You should try it.
Kayleen Wright: I think I will I think I really like it. I think I'd be really a funny person to watch. But aren't we all right,
Jen Ready: everybody, you know, everybody just, you know, takes ownership of how, how well or terrible, they dance. And but as long as you're burning calories and having fun, that's what counts.
Kayleen Wright: That's all that matters. That's perfect. So that is going to be awesome. I'm excited to kind of hear how that goes. And, you know, to for you to jump into that and do this thing. And so yeah, so Jen and I decided on talking about turning points in recovery. So I kind of have a list of turning points and maybe we can kind of go there. I didn't I didn't read yours yet. You didn't send them my way, which is cool. I don't know if you just kind of want to go one for one and just talk about them. I'm sure there'll be there'll be at least a handful that align pretty pretty well and pretty strongly, both being on this journey and having a similar kind of journey and and the steps to take. So you know, what was your first turning point? What was the first kind of turning point for you along this whole journey.
Jen Ready: I think it all started with making a choice to seek professional help. Back in 2015, I guess you could say, all of my symptoms are coming to a head, everything was sort of rising to the top. And I, I was I didn't know what to do, I was a little lost. And Around this time, my son was also getting diagnosed for ADHD. And I thought, you know, what be great if we both got some help together, and we went to the same mental health provider company. And we went together, and we, you know, we just took it head on, and making that choice to finally put a name to all the symptoms I was having. That was a huge breakthrough. Because it's, you know, when you learn about PTSD, when you read up on it, and you get diagnosed, you everything starts to fall into place, and it starts to make sense. So I think, making sense of it all, finding out, okay, I have this diagnosis, it's a really big turning point, and a good starting point to, you know, your healing journey. So that was definitely the first, first huge turning point in my recovery.
Kayleen Wright: That's awesome. And I'm glad that you said that, because that's kind of what at what I have written is like, realizing what was wrong. And that was kind of a similar on that same wavelength of, okay, so like, What even is going on, right? And then just getting a lot of clarity and understanding what exactly are all these things? What are all these emotions and these things happening, you know, within my relationship within myself and my thoughts and all that internal dialogue, and what even is that, and I think that's really, really important. And I'm glad that you said that. And, you know, something that I, you know, I have a personal kind of belief on with the labels is that there's a lot of good, and then there's a lot of bad, you know, and, and you and I have done something pretty special, I'm not gonna put my own tires, but with the label and taking the label as, okay, this is what it is. So this is what I need to search for. But then, but not accepting your, I don't know, I guess like prognosis. There's so much negativity around PTSD and the healing journey. And there's so many people just saying kind of, okay, like, now this is your life. Now. Now you have to accept this. And and both being special and saying, Okay, this is what's going on, this is what we have. And these are the paths to kind of going about this, and we're but we're gonna find a solution. And we're gonna find a way for this to not define us. And now of course, you know, what we're doing is spreading the word and spreading hope and belief. So you know, that label is still attached to us, but in a positive light. So I think that's really cool that you mentioned that. And then you said that and that you said, like, I love your mindset, just like, take this head on is super important. So that's super duper cool.
Jen Ready: I really, I don't think there's really any other way to do it. Because PTSD, it can look like so many other things, it's often goes hand in hand with depression. So I guess if you let it be, it can be this big monster. But if you don't give it that power, you don't have to, and you can take ownership of your life. And you get to set you have a say in how you're going to heal. And tell, you know, everybody who's telling me I'm going to have the rest of my life. Thank you for your opinion, but I will not accept it.
Kayleen Wright: Absolutely. That's awesome. And that's so important. And like the work we're doing now, just to tell people, you can do this, you know, it's so important. And I love that you're going to be speaking and spreading hope and talking about getting help and, and the things you can do and the things you are in control of and it doesn't have to be this big monster and I love love. Love that man. Yeah, that's awesome. And so, you know, for me along those lines, another turning point was like, coming to terms with it. So first, it was like, Okay, what kind of is going on? And then Okay, like, Okay, this is actually going on. And this is an actual issue that, you know, we need to handle right and so the I need to handle and I need to work through and you say kind of facing it head on, and that's just the perfect way to put it. You know, do you feel like there was there was a little bit of an adjustment period for you when you were like, Okay, so this is what's going on and just kind of do you feel like there's an acceptance period for you?
Jen Ready: I think so. It's, I know, for me that when I, when I did get a diagnosis, I, I felt relieved, because I you know, there's a name to this and there's something to do about it. But also, I'll admit it was overwhelming at first. And because it's all new to you, you you kind of Feel like in the beginning, it's like a life sentence like, oh, okay, I have this big cloud called PTSD over my head. And is it gonna follow me the rest of my life? I don't know, you're kind of, you're learning all that you can about, about PTSD. And all these types of ways you can, you know, all these kinds of therapies, all these things that you can do, you know, coping skills. It's a lot. So I think there's definitely, that period of time, where you're okay, you're like, Okay, this is what it is. This is how it works. This is why it's happening. I think it takes a while to, you know, absorb all that information and digest it a little bit.
Kayleen Wright: Absolutely. That's a great way to put it. And I what I have is, you know, research and understanding underneath that something I want to talk about was, I like that you said it took a weight off because like it for me, at least it was like this, like double edged sword where it was like, oh, wow, this is this is kind of really serious. But then it was like, Okay, well, this gives me kind of a jumping off point. Okay, now on my internet searches, I can dial in a little bit, and I can figure out and I can connect, and I can see, you know, there are other people with this kind of thing that's going on. So that's really, really cool. Yeah, totally. Yeah. And then just figuring out, you know, there's so much in the field and my mission, and this is something that, you know, I literally have written, I don't know if I can take it off the wall. But you know, for for, for me, and for Brad, when we were struggling, you know, the biggest thing was like, all the information was so like, like, few and far between and it was inaccessible and is complex and conflicting. And so, you know, our, that's what we have written in our kind of principles here. And you probably Oh, that's cool. Yeah. But that's something that we have for our mission to create the most effective online PTSD recovery program that allows anyone anywhere to fully recover in one spot. And that's our ultimate mission. And, you know, working towards that each and every day to you know, try and get a little bit closer and a little bit closer. Because the problem that we had, and we have this written right at the top here is most people don't believe that full recovery from PTSD is possible. Information is inaccessible, complex and conflicting. And just like so you go online, and you search PTSD, and you're like, Whoa, there is so much here. And people are saying you can and people are saying you can't and so I think that was that was kind of a cool lead into that. And I'm glad that you kind of said that. And it is cool that, you know, it takes a weight off. But it also is, you know, kind of heavy and it can be this big thing. But, you know, ultimately, it's it's you that either allows it to be this thing, or, you know, kind of take it under your wing and then work with it and work through it.
Jen Ready: Definitely. And when you're talking about how all the information out there is conflicting, and there's a plethora of it out there. What I like about your program Kayleen the broken sound breakup program, is you make the healing process. I'm sort of like, What's that one of those books that series for dummies, you get put another word on it, it'd be healing PTSD for dummies, because because you make it so simple, and you make it really easy to follow, and you make these up these apps, these actionable steps. And it's, it's really easy for us to understand it, and apply it to our lives. You know, when you when you when you're going to therapy is great. I've been to therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy EMDR. But sometimes when you go to therapy, it's a it's hard to understand. It's hard to understand. Counselors don't always, I guess, explain information in the way we can understand it. So I guess you could just take everything that you hear with a grain of salt, and do your own research, like you said, do your own research, do it little by little if you have to, because it can, it can be overwhelming. But now that it is it's your choice to take that information and do what you what you want it to do for your life, which is to heal. That's the ideally the goal you want to make is okay, I have this information. Now I'm going to use it for my advantage to heal.
Kayleen Wright: Right and that is awesome. And I so appreciate what you you know what you just said about the program. And, you know, that's the goal. And you know, we're still working on, you know, reaching more people and making it better and more cohesive and more understood, understandable and chunking it up and like we're always working to make it better because there's always kind of another level of that and I'm so happy you said that. And, you know, therapy is awesome, clinicians are great. And something I like to remind people is like they're still human. And what's challenging with a clinician is they work on a lot of different things. And so, you know, they want to make sure that you get The most out of the time that you're, you're there, and they're trying to serve you at the highest level. But sometimes they don't give you like this this step by step plan, and they don't lay it all out for you, and they don't explain everything at the level that you might really need to help you create that belief and believe in what they're doing and believe in taking action because there's such a limited timeframe. So, you know, there's absolute benefits to to that, and they are trying to serve at the highest level, and, you know, sometimes just based on time, and based on human nature, and based on their practice, it's not something that they can, you know, realistically do for each and every person, you know, they see 4050 I don't know how many people a week, you know, and trying to keep track of a recovery plan for everyone. And, you know, and not have a niche, you know, so one person has PTSD, and the next person has, you know, just anxiety or bipolar. And so, you know, there's such this human element. And so that's why, you know, I mean, obviously, it's because we've personally struggled with this, but, you know, we're in this niche, trying to help, you know, these people, and people like me, and you and, you know, Brad, and, you know, we have friends that we've helped, and it's, it's, it's amazing. And so I appreciate you saying that, and that it comes across like that, and that, you know, I just, you know, shared the the mission of what we're trying to do with you, and that aligns with, you know, your, your personal experience and our personal experience. And that is, that is absolutely awesome.
Jen Ready: Another thing that's really cool about your program, and, well, I'll just, I'll just be honest, it sort of touches on healing from a mind body soul perspective, it's not just putting a bandaid over a wound, and hoping it'll get better, you sort of hit, I guess, sort of like the trifecta of healing my body and soul, because everything is connected. And that's something you might not get from traditional therapy. I mean, it helped me a lot. And I'm so glad that I did it. But there's other parts to healing. And I feel like if you're only addressing a couple things, in your healing journey, you're not going to get the full healing effect. So
Kayleen Wright: That's exactly it, and I'm so happy you said that, because something that we talk about all the time is, like, we look at this problem from like, all these different angles. And like, I you know, I personally when I started this journey, and even so now I'm not this like, big religious person, or I'm not this big spiritual person, and I'm, you know, not going to tell you that God will heal you. But, you know, I'm also very accepting, like, if if God can really agree, you know, or, you know, whatever you believe in is true. And and you know, at the core of that your beliefs and at the core of the issue and then coming in from all angles and I'm glad that you said that because it's it's a cool approach that you know, a lot of people can come in kind of close minded into this, you know, this Yeah, lateral approach. And what you really need to do is, is take it from all sides and and like you said, not put a bandaid on but, but really heal and get to the core. And it's like, I don't know, it's like, infiltrating a castle, you know, you have to go on all sides to really be successful there. So that's, that's awesome. And thank you again, for your kind words, and, you know, ultimately, what what success in this journey comes down to isn't, you know, it's not, it's not me, it's not on my end, like, of course, my mission and our goal here is to, to serve at the highest level and to create this just amazing kind of, you know, eventually perfect program to give that roadmap but what it comes down to is people like you, Jen, and people who put in the effort and continue to, to move forward and do the work. And, you know, like, I always say, like, if I could do all the work for everyone, I totally would, but it's not how it works. And, you know, you're the one who makes it successful because you put the work in and you take action, and you should be I mean, you should just be so I'm so proud of you, I think about you every day. So proud of you and, and all that you've already accomplished and are continuing to accomplish and continuing to do and continuing to spread this hope and belief and, and be a speaker and it's going to be such a fun journey for you. And I'm so excited for you at every level. Thank you so much.
Kayleen Wright: But it's it's you that that that does the work and it makes it successful. So that's awesome.
Jen Ready: Yeah, so, anyone that's watching or listening: anything is possible. Anything's possible. If you put the work into it, you get the rewards are limitless. I mean, anything could happen.
Kayleen Wright: Truly, and that any honestly the best statement, just anything's possible and anything can happen. Exactly. And you've made incredible, like you said at the beginning leaps and bounds and just a few months of taking action consistently and it's so amazing to see and, you know, that's what I want. The other thing I want to say to people who are listening is like, we're not superhuman, you know, we're not these extraordinary people. We're like, just normal average kind of people. You know, we have bad days. We have good days. Yeah, I've definitely eaten my fair share. Have all the Halloween candy and bottles of wine, you know, when I was still drinking is still struggling, but you know, we're still human. And we're just, we're just normal people. And so we can do it, you can do it as well. Yes. So in regards to turning points. So the next one I have, you know, I talked about realizing what was wrong and kind of then accepting and coming to terms with what was what PTSD was, and kind of what to do about it. And then the third one that I have personally was, was then kind of reaching for help and reaching for support, you know, in regards to, you know, clinicians and therapy, and just getting a lot of inputs. And also in regards to kind of friends and family. There's one friend in particular, who, you know, I was able to kind of connect with, I always had trust issues and connect with and open up to, and, you know, just her acceptance and love and just saying, like, hey, like, all right, like, this is what's going on. But, you know, you can handle this and her belief in me, which may or may not have been true, I have no idea, it felt very genuine and authentic. And we're still very, very good friends. Was was another turning point for me just having someone and this was before I even told Brad, this is before I, you know, I told my partner, what was going on, although he kind of he knew what was going on. But yeah, you know, we weren't, we weren't having full conversations about it yet. And she was basically like, you can do this, you know, you can survive this, your relationship can like, if you if you just, you know, take it one step at a time, you can do it. And that was that was important for me, did you have any, anything like that, or another step kind of in regards to turning points, you know, I know, you talked about reaching for help in regards to kind of therapy and, you know, with your son and, and attacking it head on anything, anything kind of else like that?
Jen Ready: Well, since you brought it up, I think it is so vital that you get some kind of a support system together. Tell your friends and family or maybe people at church, friends at church, you know, tell them this is what's going on. I'm a little, I'm a little scared. I don't know, I don't know what's going to happen. But I could use your support. And I think reaching out and having that support system is huge. It's amazing what a little encouragement can do. It can it can get you through the bad day that you're having. It can it can give you hope. And I think that's super, super important. You know, people out there, even if it's just one person, if it's one person, if you really don't want to, you know, want a huge support group, find that one person, that you can just be your complete self. And you know, you can trust and say, Listen, I need support, be honest, and tell them I can use support, and it'll really, really help me on my healing process. So I think that's super important. And I think it's great that you had that, that person.
Kayleen Wright: Yeah, I know how lucky I was also to have that person and have her in my life and have her be supportive and like, you know, be vulnerable, and take the leap and open up to someone and then and then be accepted. You know, I know, that's a scary thing. And I know, I'm lucky to have had that at that moment, too. It was so kind of like crucial for me. So but I agree a community and you know, whether it's a big community and you just want to announce your healing journey to the world, you know, some people do that and like do your thing. And it helps them with the accountability and staying on top of things. And yeah, some people keep a very, very tight circle, I even still keep a very tight circle of people that I you know, I let into my life and like day to day, you know, talk about things that are going on in success and failure and all that stuff. But community is really important. And that's, that's awesome. Yeah. So, you know, what was the next thing that you had in regards to kind of turning points?
Jen Ready: Um, let's see. This one was really hard. And I realized I was doing myself a huge disservice by not forgiving those who did me wrong. I, you know, I kind of brushed it under the rug. Like, you know, I don't have to forgive. I honestly don't. But I realized if I was going to want to get the healing I wanted to get and be functional and be my own self. I had to forgive those who did me wrong. Those people that caused me trauma. I had to forgive them. If it when you don't forgive someone, it really eats at you. It will eat you up. You might not realize it but it really doesn't. It is so bad for the soul. It will eat you up and it will hinder you from Um, you know, finding complete healing, that that was huge. And it took me time, I will admit that it took me time. But um, you know what, when I finally, you know, I, you know what I did, I actually wrote a letter letters to the people that did me wrong, I didn't actually give it to them. But it was sort of my process of forgiving, getting it on paper, getting it all out. And seeing it for what it is like seeing the forgiveness, that really helped me find the healing that I wanted to receive, and it's sort of opened, it sort of opened my life up for good things to happen, and open up for good people to come into my life or opportunities to come into my life. Because unforgiveness, it's so it is like a, it's like a virus, I like to look at it that way, because it can affect all areas of your life. And if you don't address if you don't address forgiveness, it's really really hard to heal. It's like a really hard uphill battle. So definitely forgiveness.
Kayleen Wright: That's awesome. I'm glad that you said that. And writing letters like that can be so cathartic. And that's really important. And something that a lot of people struggle with in it, it is really an anchor that can hold you down. And I always like to tell people, like, when you're forgiving someone, you know, you're not saying what they did was okay, or good, you're not even saying they're a good person, you know, you're forgiving them. So you can live your life. So you can be free of that anchor of those chains. Because you deserve to live your life. And like you said, it's like a virus it will eat at you and it will hold you down whether you know, it's conscious, whether it's always on your mind, or, you know, we were so conscious. And it's always it's you always hold it in your chest and your heart and your soul, like you said, so I'm glad that you said that I didn't have that one written down. And that's definitely an important piece of this journey on top of and for some people as well forgiving yourself for a lot of things. So I'm glad that that came up. That was an absolutely awesome one.
Jen Ready: Yeah, that's a good point. And forgiving yourself, let's say we're not perfect. We make mistakes, and you have to forgive yourself to so you can move forward. And, you know, look, look to the future.
Kayleen Wright: Yeah, and live your life and like everyone at their core is such a good person. And there's so much love in this world. And there's so much love inside of you. And once you bring it to yourself, and this was big for me to forgive myself and bring it to myself. It everything changes. And it's it's so amazing. And I remember we talked about this in our last interview, just that moment where like, all of a sudden, your thoughts are being nice to you that internal roommate is yes, Hey, cool, good job. And you're like, what are you talking to me. And it's a really cool moment, to you know, to actually accept that self love, and, and not be something you're kind of, you're like, Okay, I love myself, but you know, not something that's really true and yourself yet. So that's really cool. And that forgiveness of self and growing within yourself. And, you know, the only thing that you're guaranteed at the end of the day is you like, that's the only thing you're guaranteed to be with is you and your mind and you know, you're in your body and your your spirit. So that's, that's awesome. I'm glad that that one came up. That was That was really good one. So for me, you know, you know, we had realizing what was wrong and coming to terms with it, and then reaching for help and building that community. And then the next thing I have is building the belief, right. And so this was huge for me, you know how much I talked about it in the program and how I mean, that's what we're doing here is helping other people build their belief, you know, in a more kind of natural way. And me for me building the belief and finding the right inputs, because there were a lot of wrong inputs, there are a lot of people telling me like this is your life now and just live with it, and you're just gonna have to cope with it. And, you know, you're never going to be able to get rid of it or be peaceful or anything like that, you know, creating the right inputs, and really building my own belief on this journey. And of course, that's our mission. And our goal now was a really big turning point to like, truly start to actually believe in find inputs and find, you know, people who have done amazing things, you know, PTSD related or not people have faced hardship, and you know, they've overcome it or over, they've overcame it, whatever, you know, throughout their life. And that belief being so important in my personal journey, and I think a lot of journeys. Did you have a turning point of a belief or was there a moment where you felt the belief shift or did you always have it and something said it?
Jen Ready: I...no. I truly believed what I was being told. I truly, believed that, you know, I am going to have this for the rest of my life. It's like, "Oh, dang, that kind of sucks. Bu when I chose--and it's this is so hard--it was hard for my mind to wrap, get my head around this, but really it's a choice. And I used to hate hearing that. Because it's true. It's a choice. I had to make that choice to believe that healing is possible. And that I could do it. And it takes, it took me time. Because you are fighting all these decades worth of negative beliefs, you know, just that have piled on to each other and that are super deep-rooted. But that was a huge turning point, believing that I could hea. Wow, it, it kind of opened up my mind to think, "Okay, if I can heal, I'm seeing results already. I'm seeing I can see myself heal and feel it. If this is possible, what else is possible? Then pretty much everything else, you know, in the world is possible." And it's exciting. It's really, really exciting. It's like, okay, I can do this, then that can do that. You know? It really it's possible. It all starts with the belief that, that you can, it might take a while, but you'll get there. And yeah, it... that was that was a huge lesson that you taught me, Kayleen. And I sort of came into the program, kind of a little clueless. I'm thinking, "Okay, she's telling me that she's cured. She's telling me she doesn't have PTSD". I'm like, "Okay, I'm just gonna go ahead and go with it."
Kayleen Wright: That's good! I mean, yeah!
Jen Ready: I'm gonna go with it. And you know, what, why not? Why shouldn't I believe it? So I just, I went for it. And that was huge. It opened up my... kind of, like, took my dirty glasses off. Like, I could see just a whole different world in front of me.
Kayleen Wright: That is awesome. And I like that you said that about dirty glasses. And just like, "Okay, why not?" And, you know, sometimes, you know, people come into the program, or they they meet me, and they're like, "Okay, but really?" And I'm like, "Yeah, really." And I know it's hard to believe. And sometimes I look back, you know, over the years, and, you know, I see like, a picture that reminds me of, you know, that time in my life or something. I'm like, wow, like, I did it. Like, I'm really like, I can't even believe that, you know, sometimes that like, holy cow, that was my life and how I'm here and like, it's awesome, right? And it's great. And I'm I like that, you know, that dirty glasses, you know. I like to... now you know, and this isn't a recommendation always. But I live my life through rose colored glasses And I like that you said, you know, once you open the door, basically to the belief, it opens the door to like, well, if I can do this, what about this? And what about this. and like you start to lead this. and that's the very specific reason we called it Broken to Unbreakable was like, okay, you know, you're, you're at a point where it hurts. And for a lot of people at rock bottom, and you know, you feel broken, you're not broken, but you feel broken, and people are telling you that you're broken.
And then you know, we don't just want to get you to like, normal, like, we want to get you to extraordinary! Because once you build those habits, and you build those beliefs, and you you do recover, then from there, it's like, well, dang, like, I went this far, like, let's keep it going! We have all this, let's keep it going. And that's what you're doing. That's exactly what you're doing. Like with tiny bright, and with speaking gigs, and school; and like you've taken it and now you have this momentum. And it's like pushing a boulder right, it's challenging at first to build that belief; to believe it, to believe what I'm saying believe you know, because you're not, you know, in my like personal physical world. So you know, we're just kind of on the internet together. But to believe what I'm saying and then to get that boulder and push, and believe that it is possible, and it's possible for me; and then you start to see the results. And then all of a sudden, this boulder is just like going on its own and you're trying to run to catch up. So I think that's really cool that you said tha,t and that's that's awesome and such a such a huge thing for people. And that's... every piece of content that I create - that we create - you know, (and I know that you do)is creating that belief. You have to have, to believe that it's possible because if you believe it, anything's possible.
Jen Ready: Absolutely. Absolutely. And we... I feel like people... I know I was like this and I'm still working on it, but people don't really give themselves enough credit. You don't give yourself enough credit. Listen. If you... if today it was really hard to get out of bed, but you did it anyways, Good job. That's your win for today. If you landed that job, that's huge! Way to go. You need to celebratet yourself in any way that you can. Because that will help you strengthen that belief that you can heal, and that you can do anything you set your mind to.
Kayleen Wright: For real, and those wins, celebrating those wins are so important. I've made that so much of a habit for myself now. And it was something I struggled with at first to be like, okay, you did it, like you did three things on your list. And, you know, nowadays look a lot different, but it is important to celebrate. I got out of bed today, you know, pat yourself on the back, you deserve it. Jen, you just passed a college class, you just you went back to school, and you got a scholarship. and you took the class. and you passed it! And that's huge! And, you know, that's a huge win. But these little wins along the way and getting good at, you know, affirming yourself for them. And that's something I do like in my life now. I'm like, the most supportive person on the planet. You know, like when Brad does, like the dishes or like, I don't know, he'll do something. He'll like, throw something into the trash, and it'll go into the trash. Yeah. And I just, like kind of wild. And just because I've just built that into this like, weird, overly enthusiastic habit, just celebrating all those little wins. But it's, it's such a good environment. And it's so fun to just be supportive.
And then to bring that to yourself. And like he always looks at me, and he's like, he gets all like, gets all excited. He's like, Oh, yeah, I did it, you know, and just then can affirm himself, even for those little, you know, silly moments. But I'm glad that you brought that up. Because it's really important. And it keeps the ball rolling, and you get to acknowledge each and every step. Hey, I got out of bed, nailed it. Great. You know, I got of bed once this week when I wasn't getting out of bed at all; you know, I took a shower two times this week when I wasn't doing that at all. And those little,
tiny wins, you know, they build to this compound effect. So that's, I'm glad that you said that. Yeah, that's awesome.
Jen Ready: So let me try and look at my list right now. Okay. So here's an interesting story. I don't know how to start it. But in the summer of 2017, it was probably one of my toughest years, mental-health wise. And my symptoms, oh, my gosh, they were terrible. My depression was terrible. And I had suicidal thoughts. I've had them before. And they call it, you know, suicidal ideation. But this time, it was different. And things weren't going the way... I was, I guess I was, I was trying to try my hardest to get myself out of this quicksand. And I just felt like the harder I tried, the deeper I was, you know, getting sucked in the quicksand. So eventually, I was driving to work one day, I'm in my uniform. I used to work at a florist shop, and I really loved it. Had my uniform on: my apron, my black slacks and everything, and I'm driving to work. And I keep thinking in the back of my head, my husband keeps telling me you need to go, you need help. You need help, because I kept talking about not wanting to live anymore. I was talking about it out loud. And I didn't even realize I was doing that.
So I guess I just acted on what he told me I should do. And I called my boss, I was literally on my way to work and then I changed my my direction. I called my boss. I said, "Listen, I'm not coming to work today. I don't know how to tell you, but I'm suicidal. It is what it is. And I'm going to the ER right now." So he said, "Okay, good. Take care of yourself. Let us know if you need anything." So I walked into the ER with my uniform on. And that was a huge breakthrough. Because I felt like I was doing it all on my own. But I finally I finally gave in and realized, "Okay, I need more. I need more help. Okay, I need more help... I need to see what's going on. You know, I don't know if it's medication wise or... I really need help, and I need to be in the hospital right now." And that's what I did.
I was scared. I have medical trauma. But that was one of the best decisions that I've ever made. And it you know, as bad as it was having suicidal thoughts, it went well. So I got a new treatment plan. I saw a new doctor. And when I got out of the hospital, two days, just two days, I got out of the hospital. I was driving to one of my favorite places to decompress, which is a garden. I used to live in Ohio. I'm on my way there, and this is just only a couple of days after I got out of the hospital. I stopped by this garage sale, and I'm like, "Okay, I love a good garage sale." I just stopped by, you know, on a whim. As soon as... like 10 seconds after I was out of my car, I hear the most eerie scream from a child. I'm like, "What is going on?" So I don't know if you're like thi,s Kayleen, but you sort of have those, like 10 seconds where you're trying to assess. Is this an emergency? What's going on? What should I do? So I ran over there to console the child. I wanted to see if she was hurt. I didn't know what was going on. She was looking over my shoulder and still screaming. So I looked over my shoulder.
And I saw this man, at least 200 pounds. He was like six feet tall, 200 pounds. And he was choking this woman, like telling her he was gonna kill her. And he did not look right. I was looking at his eyes. And I was like, okay, there's, there's only a couple ways this can go. There's, there's no way I can take on a 200-pound guy. I'm like, I'm less than five feet. I'm this little girl. So I just quickly thought of a couple of my classes I took at Kent State. I used to study conflict management. And what I did was okay, I need to match the violence with a peaceful stance. So that's what I did. I walked up to him. I touched his shoulder really softly. And I look at him in the eyes and talk to him as soft as I can, but in an assertive way. And I told him, it's okay. It's okay. I'm just trying to get him from 100 to at least 50. And I was... thank you Jesus, I was successful in getting him to let go of her. And I quickly just grabbed her. And I ran her like across the street. So she was safe.
That was one of the craziest things that ever happened to me in my life. And the irony, it doesn't get lost. I saved this woman's life. If I hadn't gone over there, who knows what would have happened? He was on something. I don't know what; drugs, alcohol, I don't know. But he was on something. And I don't think she would have made it had I not been put in the right place at the right time. So when I helped save this woman's life, it was such... It was a big aha moment. Like, okay, now I get it, Jesus. Okay, I get it, I have a purpose on this earth. Now, I believe it, I had a renewed purpose. And, you know, just slap me in the face, hey, Jenny, you belong here. You're not going anywhere. There's purpose for you. I'm not done. I'm not done with you yet. So that, that sort of... that lit the fire under me to to take PTSD and, instead of using it against me, I'm about to turn PTSD into PTSD growth. And I'm gonna make it to what I want it to make it and I'm gonna makePTSD serve me, so that I can help others. And that's, I mean, that's what happened. That was a crazy story.
Kayleen Wright: That is awesome. Thank you so much for sharing that, and what a direct message, right? I love that you said, "Just like slap me in the face." And just like everything that... you know, I'm someone who believes in kind of fate and like, everything happens for a reason; each and every step, even the pain. You know, each kind of moment led you there into you know, you feeling the way you were feeling and then you know, going to reach for help and then going you know, on your way to a spot to decompress, and your love of garage sales (which I'm personally a huge fan of). And that's super cool. Thank you for sharing that. And what a moment what a very direct message that, you know, each and every life has such significant impact, and sometimes such direct impact on others. You know, and there's that direct impact. That's just like just right there, like that story you shared. And then there's like, you know, you let someone go in front of you at the grocery store and all this chain reaction and you know, you save a million lives, you know, there's all this indirect impact. So that's super cool. And thank you so much for sharing that. What a very cool turning point. I love it. I just love your description. I'm gonna tell Brad that in a minute, just like just slap me in the face.
Jen Ready: Yea, that's what it felt like!
Kayleen Wright: Very, very cool. So yeah, after that, you know, was there was that kind of your... were there any other kind of turning points? You know, after that one?
Jen Ready: I think making the decision to, to help others and turn this, like ugly thing called PTSD, but turn it into something beautiful. So that you can help other people heal, because there are so many people out there--and I was one of them--that are so lost, and they're losing hope. And sadly, many people lose their battle withPTSD. And I chose... you know what, if I save you, if I help you - one person, then that's, you know, mission accomplished. That's one more person on this earth, that has a little bit more hope that has that coping skill to get through a panic attack, whatever. I think choosing to use terrible circumstances in your life, using those to help others is one of the most rewarding things you can do. And I believe it really reinforces healing.
Because you look at it, you look at those bad times in a completely different way. Yes, that stuff happened. But guess what, I rose above it. And now I've got to help other people rise above it, too. So that was definitely a turning point in my healing, because I believe that you need to get to a certain kind of healing, before you can help other people, obviously. So that was, that was a big moment in my, in my healing and my recovery. And it's also... it helps you to not feel like you're alone. When you're helping other people, you're meeting other people who have similar struggles. You say, "Oh, wow, there's all these people that have panic attacks, all these people, these people have trouble sleeping, or nightmares." You feel like, okay, we're all we're all in this together, we can do it. And, you know, the world is yours.
Kayleen Wright: That's awesome. And the world is your oyster, and I love your drive to help other people and you know, it's such a... when people come from a place of pain, you know, it's a, it's a common drive to want to want to help other people out of that pain, because you know, that pain, right, you've like stood in that pain, and you lived in that pain, there's been so much pain, you know, in your life that, like, you don't want anyone to be in pain. Like I wouldn't want the worst person in the world to feel, you know, the pain that I felt, or anyone to feel that pain. And to you know, be able to even do, like you said, one thing, one moment, one word, one little thing to help someone, you know, either ease their pain or of course, like ultimate goal, like heal the world, but like, just a little bit makes it all worth it. And all the strength it took to get through the recovery journey. And, you know, the the action and the commitment and everything, you know, it makes it all you know, not just worth it, because it's worth it for you. And you know, that's something that you have to work on is you know, being there for you. But it makes it worth it a hunderedfold, you know, just to touch one individual, and to give back and to, like spread the knowledge that you've learned. You know, I always like, thought about it, you know, Brad kind of was a big genesis in helping people, and helping people at the level that we do now. And he was like, "Well, why would you like just sit on that knowledge? That's kind of selfish, like, like you like, what would you do?" Like, you know, and then, you know, I had that drive too. And he helped me kind of more cohesively be like, "Oh, well, I guess that's a really good point. I shouldn't just keep it to myself. So that's, that's really cool that you said that and that you have that drive to do that. I love that drive in people, and it can be a really big motivator, even along the recovery journey. Because like you said, you have to get to a certain level, you have to be able to take care of yourself, you have to be good in yourself because you can't pour from an empty cup, in order to help people at the highest level. And you know, that's kind of where you're at. Now you're going to be speaking, and you're going to do all these amazing things. And that's really, really exciting. And I'm glad that that was kind of a motivator and a driver for you, and a turning point within within that journey.
Jen Ready: I think that's so great that he kind of... he showed you, "Well, you have all this wealth of information. Let's help other people." That's, I mean, I think it's so amazing what you have done with all the information that you put into Unbreakable. You know, what is it I'm sorry? Breakable to unbreakable. Yeah. Is that what it's called?
Kayleen Wright: Broken to Unbreakable. You got it. I do that all the time.
Jen Ready: But there's, I think that's, that's amazing. And I feel like, your program is sort of like this diamond, and they're wrapped. And there's a lot of people that don't know about it, but I see that you have, you're sending out this mail, you have new clients every day. That's so awesome what you guys do, and you do it together. Like, that's, that's so cool, you get to do this with your significant other. That's so cool!
Kayleen Wright: It's an amazing journey. And thank you, as always for, for being so kind and supportive. And we do, we're reaching new people every day, and spreading this hope every day, and doing things like this, like this interview that, that you're the genesis of; it's is so important and impacts so many people now, you know, now that we've been doing this for for a while now, you know, we have this reach, you know, we have, we're able to... we have all these platforms that we can now like speak on and people come to the platforms to hear the belief and to you know, have the information. And it's it's a super amazing journey, we're very lucky that you know, we're able to, to work together, obviously. And, you know, that definitely took our relationship to the next level. And being able to be with someone all day is, is different than you know, just just a couple hours at night or just on the weekends or anything. But it's amazing. And thank you for the support that you have for us and what we do, and we're we, we talk about you all the time! We love you, you're so inspiring. And all the things that you're doing are amazing. And we're rooting for you. And we want to, of course serve you and help you in the biggest way, and inany way that we can. And I love... I love doing these with you. Because you know, you're just like, let's do this, and I have this idea. And like, let's do something! And that's awesome. And the more content the better, and, you know, sharing and being vulnerable with each other and the truth about you know, what we experienced and what happened, you know, on the recovery journey is not always straightforward. It's not always easy. Yeah, it's a it's sometimes very confusing, but so I'm glad that that you brought that up. And that, you know, we're here together and making an impact now together in a very big way. And we're going to continue to make that impact for ever.
Jen Ready: Yes!
Kayleen Wright: Yes!,
Jen Ready: We're doing it!
Kayleen Wright: Exactly. We're doing it, we're here, we made it, we're doing it! We're on the other side. And you know, I always say like, I want to reach out a hand to you and like pull you on to this side, and like you have to do the work, but I want I want everyone on this side. And then you know, I want to put the power in your hands. You know, I love that, you know, people come to me for help and advice and guidance and are within the program and work with me and coach with me. But like my ultimate goal is, like, I want to give you all the information I have so you can be set for the rest of your life. And then if I never hear from you again, or if you come back like Jen and you then now we're working together and we're creating this thing together, you know, but if you just want to leave the nest and fly and do your own thing, that's great. You know, I love you. And if you want to come back, come back, but if I never hear from you, again, I'll take that as a good sign.
But I love doing stuff like this with you, Jen. It's so awesome, so fruitful, you're such an easy person to talk to. It's such a great input for people to hear the belief from ultimately as many mouths as possible is the best but, but from someone who's been there and done it and just recently! And you're just like, we're gonna get to see your growth, we're gonna get to see you, you know, go from, from where you're at now to like these unbelievable heights; and continue to achieve, and succeed, and continue to talk along the journey. And then all of a sudden, in a few years, we're gonna have these like videos in a playlist to be like, wow, that was fast. Here's Jen's video on Oprah. And it's like, "Wow, she went from that to that, you know, so. So that's really, really cool. And I'm glad that you set these up.
Jen Ready: Thanks for being open, you know, to have me on your on your podcast, and it's really, really fun. And it's, it's so cool to get to know you better at a, you know, more intimate level. And it's amazing that you're allowing me to, you know, share my hope for others. You know, it's... I'm a real person, I have the real struggles. Life's been hard, but guess what? If I can do it, you know, anyone can do it. And whatever you want to achieve in life, if you put the work into it, it is possible.
Kayleen Wright: Absolutely. And what a great message, and Jen and I've both done it. And I love when people hear from people other than me, you know, like, they're like, "Well, Kay, are you even real?" And I'm like, "Well, I am. But I can't prove it all that much unless you want to come stay with us..." So you know, the more people the better. And I'm happy to share the community that we've built and the platform that we've created to share, you know, your experiences and what you're doing, because it's so amazing. And you're touching so many people locally and globally, you know, we have like this global platform, that's amazing. I work with people all over the world, and the impact that has, and it's, you know, there's parts of the world that I've never been to, and I might never be to. Maybe I'll go visit, but I don't know, if I'll ever go to Australia, it's not my thing. But I work with people there. And they're so amazing and so supportive. And, you know, everyone hears your message and my message. And it's, it's so cool to share it. So thank you so, so much for all that you're doing to help us help others, and give to others, and serve others at the highest level. And that is kind of what I have, do you have any kind of final thoughts or final things you want to kind of say, or wrap up with, or...
Jen Ready: I think... I want people to be kind to themselves, it's easier to be kind to others than yourself. But if you don't give yourself that love, if you don't give yourself the room to have the rough days, then you will have nothing of you to give. So be kind to yourself. Healing as possible. And hit up Kayleen! She's awesome! She's an awesome cheerleader. I feel like I can take you anywhere; you're like in my pocket. So, Yeah. Anything's possible, guys. And yeah, it's a good day, it's a good day to have a good day.
Kayleen Wright: Heck, yeah, it's a good day to have a good day. I like that a lot. And thank you for saying all the kind things about me as always, Jen. And you know, I love that message: be kind to yourself. You know, believe in yourself. We're here for you, we believe in you. You know, we're gonna give you the hope. We love you. We believe in each and every one of you at the highest leve. We know that you can do this. But you have to be kind to yourself, and believe in yourself and do the work yourself and reach out. You know, I'm always here. Jen is here as a resource. And you know, we're here doing this thing together, we're on this journey together now. And we're all in this together. So don't... you know, don't be afraid to reach out. Like Jen and I said, both here talking about our turning points in recovery. You know, reaching for help was was a big turning point for both of us. So no matter kind of what medium or what goes on, that's an important piece. And being kind to yourself.
Of course, as always, people just in general aren't kind enough to themselves. So we know you're a good person, even if you don't fully believe that right now. Be a little kind to yourself today. It's a good day to have a good day. And I think that's what we have for you.
Thank you so much. And for doing this; thanks for being here again. Thank you all for listening and being here. You know, again, we love you, we believe in you, we're here for you. And hopefully we'll be back soon. I'm sure we'll do this again. We'll kind of keep doing this and we'll be able to talk about a bunch of different topics. So you get to hear from not only myself and not only Bad and myself when we do the podcast, but Jen as well. And Jen issuch a great resource who's been there, done it (and just recently), and is, you know, is winning on a huge leve now! Not even just those little wins, even though those little wins are still important, but on a big level. So congrats, Jen, on passing the class, and thank you doing all these great things. And I'm sure I'll talk to you soon but with everything in the meantime, and, and yeah, have a great day. It's a great day to have a great day.
Jen Ready: Yes, I'll see you later, Kayleen. Bye!